Thursday, January 27, 2011

Potty Training 102

While so far not quite like my first experience potty training, teaching a boy how to "do his business" is... shall we say... different. Some friends requested a blog post with tips. This is the best I've got.

#1: Underpants are a must from the beginning. Side note: they are NOT panties. Please do not make the mistake of calling them such in front of your husband.

#2: Use any means necessary to make the potty fun. I could almost guarantee the inventor of the smart phone had no idea just how brilliant he was.

#3. Gravity does not work on all things. Mommy has to help out a bit. Side note: do not for a moment relax your "readiness stance". This will backfire. I'm just sayin'.

#4. Potty training can be stressful for a little one. Make sure he has good playmates or fun games to help him relax in the interim.

#5: Potty training is stressful for Mommy. Make sure to have a relief trainer ready to take over in the evenings. Side note: make sure your relief trainer is prepared for the commitment the job entails. Then, when the child is standing in a puddle of urine, said trainer won't look around and ask what was spilled.

#6: Do your best to keep the child happy during training days. Elbows to the face, sucker punches, and headlocks are off limits for the potty training child. All wrestling matches and sibling rivalries can resume after the child has completed his course.

#7: See #6. In keeping with the happy child rule, Easter bonnets, gaudy necklaces and princess dresses are within the boundaries of allowable apparel.

If you follow the above rules, you are sure to have your child potty trained within 3 hours of beginning the training session. This plan holds no guarantees. I assert that I am not a certified potty trainer and would never in my life wish that on my worst enemy. Just keepin' Mommyhood real.

Friday, January 21, 2011

The Middle Child

I know, sweet boy. I am one, too.

Tuesday, January 11, 2011

Train A Child In the Way He Should Go

Praying Proverbs 22:6 for my dear ones, and training away.

(The words are: "Read your Bible, pray every day, and you'll grow, grow, grow")

Friday, January 7, 2011

Entertainment for 3

Those Leap Frog people are geniuses.

Wednesday, January 5, 2011

There's Nothing Like Familiarity

This boy just received numerous presents from Santa, 2 parents, 4 grandparents, aunts & uncles, great aunts, and cousins. Yet this is where I found him this morning.

He always did love that thing; some things never change. In his defense, at least he still had on his hearing aids.